If you want to be the popular one at a party, here's a good thing to do: Go up to some people
who are talking and laughing and say, "Well, technically that's illegal." It might fit in with what
somebody just said. And even if it doesn't, so what, I hate this stupid party.
Random Thought of the Day - 3/31/05
Mom used to make the most beautiful Easter eggs. Then she'd hid them in the backyard. But
they were so beautiful, when we found one, we weren't allowed to pick it up. We had to point at
it, and then Mom would come pick it up with her white gloves and put it back in its case.
Somebody ended up smashing all those eggs with a hammer. I think it was our dog.
Random Thought of the Day - 3/14/05
If you see an animal and you can't tell if it's a skunk or a cat, here's a good saying to help:
"Black-and-white, stinks all right. Tabby-colored, likes a fella."
Random Thought of the Day - 3/6/05
Sometimes I think the world has gone completely mad. And then I think, "Aw, who cares?" And
then I think, "Hey, what's for supper?"
Random Thought of the day 2/15/05
I remember we were all horrified to see Grandpa up on the roof with his Superman cape on.
"Get down " yelled Uncle Lou. "Don't move " screamed Grandma. But Grandpa wouldn't listen.
He walked to the edge of the roof and stuck out his arms, like he was going to fly. I forget what
happened after that.
Random Thought of the day 1/27/05
Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights, even if you don't know
what your rights are, or who the person is you're talking to. Then on the way out, slam the door.
(I think we know a certain psycho-person that would actually do this - TMG)
Random Thought of the Day - 1/13/05
Consider the daffodil. And while you're doing that, I'll be over here, looking through your stuff.
Random Thought of the Day - 1/3/05
Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy
screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing.
Random Thought of the Day - 12/21/04
If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while you're in there some guys
come and seal up both ends and then put it on a truck and take it to another city, boy, I don't
know what to tell you.
Random Thought of the Day - 12/09/04
You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who make people happy,
but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.
Random Thought of the Day - 11/29/04
Laurie got offended that I used the word "puke." But to me, that's what her dinner tasted like.
Random Thought of the Day - 11/23/04
If you're robbing a bank and you're pants fall down, I think it's okay to laugh and to let the
hostages laugh too, because, come on, life is funny.
Random Thought of the Day - 11/19/04
Whenever I hear the sparrow chirping, watch the woodpecker chirp, catch a chirping trout, or
listen to the sad howl of the chirp rat, I think: Oh boy! I'm going insane again.
